A fight between a husband and wife intrigued our beloved Gossip Bai! But what followed was more interesting that will compel us to rethink the way we use our gadgets & social media.
As I got up, a cool morning breeze touched my face to tell me that today is going to be an excellent one! After finishing up with the morning rituals, I decided to make my special ‘adrak waali chai’. Adrak waali chai or ginger tea is a staple beverage in every Indian household. Nobody likes to compromise with it, and those who does are not even HUMANS!! They are SUPERHUMANS!
Anyway, as I left the tea to boil in pan, my doorbell rang. Surprised, I opened it and was even more surprised to find Gossip Bai at my door. She was early…and she was panting!
“I will also have a cup of tea”, she said.
“Huh”, I shot a look at her. But looking at her flustered face, I decided to keep my cribbing at bay. After pouring chai into the two cups, I offered her one.
“Smells Nice”, Gossip Bai said.
I said nothing and decided to sip my chai peacefully. Once, comfortable Gossip Bai decided to make my morning no less than an Indian News Channel where all you get is quick political gossips along with murders and killings.
With a short sip she started telling me about a fight between a couple residing in the apartment on 9th floor.
So the story goes like this. The wife and husband got up like every regular couple only to found themselves in a domestic soup. While the husband decided to freshen up his sleepy senses by switching on TV, the wife decided it was the time to give him some entertainment, exclusively scripted for him.
The wife complained about him watching too much television all the time and the husband retorted back by pointing out at her scrolling through her phone throughout the day. Both of them kept on yelling while our Gossip Bai kept on absorbing as much information as she could.
After arguing for over a couple of minutes they realise that they are fighting in the presence of the greatest Gossip Mongers and asked her to leave.
Once she told me the entire scene with her large eyes widely open, she started finishing her work. After her departure from my home, I began pondering over the incident. Isn’t it true how our screen time have taken our conversation-time with our partner and family members?
We would be much happier looking at our smartphones and television screens instead of looking at their sad, happy, groggy, confused or disappointed faces. When after a long and tiring day at work, you are met with tap tap tap on a phone screen instead of a human hug, it takes away the essence of affection.
Smart phones are taking our attention and focus away from our relationships and partners. They are the major reasons behind discontentment and emotional stress in relationships. At some point of time, we all feel ignored by our respective partners, however, with the social media evolution it has become a status quo.
A relationship is all about giving, receiving, caring, sharing, listening and understanding. But, if your partner is reading or liking a post or scrolling mindlessly, it is obvious that he or she is absent at that moment. It negatively impacts a relationship and intimacy equation with partners. Using a smartphone is totally different. Once you are on it, you are on it for endless hours.
Who would have thought that a small 5 inches screen can be the cause of strife and stressful relationships between a couple a decade ago. However, the problem is serious because when we are discontent or unhappy in a relationship, we begin to look elsewhere to fill the void caused by ignorance.
So how can we make our relationships work in these times of tight deadlines, stressful working environment and our partners glued to screens?
Here are few tips that might look simple but can definitely have a positive effect on our lives:
1. Designate Tech-Free Time: Set aside specific times during the day or week where both partners agree to disconnect from gadgets completely. Use this time to engage in meaningful conversations, activities, or simply enjoy each other’s company without distractions.
2. Create Tech-Free Zones: Establish certain areas in your home, such as the bedroom or dining area, where gadgets are not allowed. This creates opportunities for genuine connection and intimacy without the interference of screens or notifications.
3. Practice Active Listening: Prioritize connection and communication with your partner. Put down the gadgets and actively listen to your partner when they’re speaking. Show genuine interest in their thoughts, feelings, and experiences without the distraction of texts, emails, or social media updates.
4. Engage in Shared Activities: Instead of spending time on individual gadgets, find activities that you both enjoy and can do together. Whether it’s cooking a meal, going for a walk, or trying out a new hobby, shared experiences strengthen bonds and foster intimacy.
5. Communicate Openly: Discuss the impact of gadget usage on your relationship openly and honestly. Share your concerns, set boundaries, and brainstorm solutions together. By communicating effectively, you can find a balance that allows for both digital connectivity and meaningful connection with your partner.
Implementing the above-mentioned tips will prove useful if we all will try it sincerely. Because, let’s accept it, a home without your loved ones is just a building made from mortar and brick. Our close relationships make our lives happier by giving us reasons to look forward to everyday.
So, what are you looking at? Unplug your tv and phones and reconnect with your partner to enhance make your relationship and intimacy bond stronger!
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